Located at 825 N Monroe St, Spokane, WA by the courthouse, this burrito was massive!

Chowderhead’s breakfast burrito costs $16 and comes with eggs, breakfast potatoes, roasted peppers, choice of bacon or sausage, cheese, and hot sauce. I added jalapeños and avocado for $3 extra!

With tax & tip I paid $25. #thanksobama

Now let’s look at the tape. My official green burrito plate could barely contain this sucker. And at nearly 8.5″ in length and 9.5″ in GIRTH, this baby was a big ‘un.

Using the official burrito/drug dealer/sourdough scale, this baby weighed in at 1lb 1.5ozs!

An absolute gut bomb, full of eggs and cheese and potatoes. You could eat on this motherfucker for a day.

Seriously, it took me from 11am to 3pm to finish it off.

Solid outside crispiness, perfect cooking inside. Even distribution of peppers and meat, every bite hit.

I’m not picky, but I prefer home fries inside a breakfast burrito, but the shredded hash browns were okay, if a bit mushy.

Definitely add jalapeños, as I wouldn’t have tasted much of a kick otherwise. Avocado was a nice addition as well.

Their cold brew is the strongest I’ve had in the city, so if you’re stopped up or just jonesing for a case of the bubble guts,

So while I recommend doubling up on a breakfast burrito and a large cold brew (as the kids say, it slaps), just don’t be planning a hike or a long distance run, cause you’ll wanna be near a baño!

BOTTOM LINE:

Overall a good start to our burrito ranking adventure. Big, tasty, needed more spice for me, but a good solid breakfast burrito that will fill you up all day long. However, I do wish it had come with some salsa on the side.

RANKING: 3.5 out of 5 Zyras!

Located at 3115 E Mission Ave, Spokane, WA, this burrito was hefty!

I ordered their Chorizo Burrito and man it was a big sumbitch!

I paid $20.18 w/tax, but I added guacamole and pico to the burrito which added $3 and change.

For you size queens out there: 6.5″ in length and 8″ in GIRTH.

Using the official burrito scale, this baby weighed in at 1lb 60zs!

No grill needed, the tortilla contained everything without the need for a charred shell.

Burrito House’s Chorizo Burrito comes with eggs, potatoes the way I like ’em (home fry-style/cubed), cheese, and chorizo, all wrapped up in a flour tortilla.

I added guacamole and pico for an extra $3.25 (new rule for these reviews, if given the option to add avocado in any form, I will do it, no questions asked).

Their burritos come with a side of salsa, red or green. I chose both because why not? We all die alone, enjoy all the salsa!

Anyway, this thing was great. Dense, flavorful, not a ton of heat (I like heat), but if you added the red salsa, you could get an uptick in mouth spiciness! The verde was herbal, cilantro-y, and a nice touch.

BOTTOM LINE:

What a great breakfast burrito. I ate it like 3 hours ago and am still full. I may never be able to eat again. Bonus points to the burrito for having a Burrito House branded to-go bag!

RANKING: 4.5 out of 5 Zyras!

Located in downtown SPOKANE at 818 W Riverside Ave, this burrito was a DISAPPOINTMENT!

I ordered the Brunch Burrito: quinoa chorizo, potato, pickled onion, avocado, arugula, black bean relish, wrapped in a warm flour tortilla

I paid $23.21 w/tax & tip.

The moment I picked up the to-go order, I knew I overpaid. For y’all size queens out there: 6″ in length but ONLY 7″ in GIRTH.

Using the official burrito scale, this tiny bitch weighed in at 12.80zs!

First off, what the fuck is quinoa chorizo? I thought it was going to be 1/2 veg and 1/2 pig parts, but nope, just a cold evil facsimile of what someone with no sense of smell or taste thinks chorizo is.

I feel duped.

Their burritos come with a side of salsa and pico. The salasa had some good heat, the only redeeming quality to the meal.

BOTTOM LINE:

To quote my co-worker Amanda, this is the Rob Lowe of breakfast burritos. Looks good, nice packaging, but not a lot of substance or flavor.

RANKING: 2 out of 5 Zyras!

maddie’s sits at the intersection of indiana and n. Washington St. Offical addy is 1825 N Washington street.

I ordered the Spicy Sunrise and man it was disappointing. It comes with choice of meat (I chose sausage), scrambled eggs, cheese, grilled onion, peppers, green chili and hash browns; topped with ranchero sauce and sour cream.

I paid over $25 with tax and tip (but I did add avocado)

Heavy in the bag, I knew I was gonna have a gut bomb of a burrito, but was it going to be sexy? No, no it was not. This burrito was as un-sexy as when I was 13 and my dad and mom locked their door and giggled all morning, and then my dad came out shirtless hiking his boxers up telling us kids “mom’s tired, dad’s making waffles for breakfast!”

Now for the facts…

Weight: 1lb 13.8oz

Length: 6.5″

Girth: This is a smothered burrito, a fork and knife burrito (loses a Zyra for that alone), so no use in messing up the official measuring tape!

Flavor was incredibly bland for something called the Spicy Sunrise. The ranchero sauce tasted like weak spaghetti sauce with no spice or smokiness, and every ingredient blended together into one mushy bite. Even the avocado couldn’t help. Honestly, the free fruit bowl was the best part.

BOTTOM LINE:

I was going to rank this 1.5 out of 5 Zyras, but at least it filled me up. Not in a good way, near zero flavor, but life can’t always be about flavor, I guess! Fuck this burrito though, it could have been so much better.

RANKING: 2 out of 5 Zyras!